Finished MiniProjects

First I made my own stuffed bunny. See below post .

Today I made banana bread from scratch for the first time. It tastes really good.

Top Guilty Pleasures

1. Lego! I love the stuff to death and have boxes and boxes of it! A few years ago I pulled all of it out and built every single set. It was about 150+ sets of lego.


2. 80's music - Ashamed to admit my secret addiction to it but I can't go through a day without my dose. It's an ironic one considering I was only alive for like 2 years in the 80's.


3. Musicals - 99% of the kick ass


4. Lame T.v. Shows - Greys Anatomy, Ugly Betty etc etc. I have time shifting so incase I miss them I can always watch them late at night. The ultimate guilty t.v. pleasure has to be my super sweet 16. Nothing better then watching spoiled rich kids throw tantrums. It's a double whammy too because its on MTV which basically stands for trash tv in my mind.



5. As a vegetarian I probably should not enjoy eating things that resemble meat but darn I really enjoy some of the veggie "meat" products. Tofuturkey anyone?


and last but not least my top guilty pleasure

Spending time with my friends or on my computer when I actually should be working on stuff. Oooops!

Today I made a bunny

Today I made a bunny - I sowed him by hand.

Gun Shaped Items

One of my personal favorite blog entries taken of my artsy blog. 

1. A gun shaped blow dryer? Something seems really wrong about this especially since well... you point a blowdryer or should I say gundryer at your head.



3. This is another absurd item I found. Kids get suspended for pointing "gun" shaped chicken fingers (or was it a nugget) and going bang. Can you imagine the uproar with this ruler? Plus what does a gun have to do with measuring? ... Well aside from being a super cool design that has grown on me and I want now.. 



3. And of course the last item... Nothing matches up to this one:



This unfortunate toy gun has a whistle on the end of the barrel. 

It's a toy where the basketball spins and opens up when you pull the trigger. As it spins it plays music. Oh yeah, it's got a whistle that you play by sticking the barrel of this gun-shaped toy in your mouth!

Few more randoms for fun:

Let there be fur?

I was watching TV and my dog came to snuggle up on me. With this came a snowfall of fur. 

This marks the a very joyous occasion. The moment Holiday partying starts my dog seems to go into full shed. This usually means she looses the weight equivalent of a cat in fur. It seems to be her special touch to the season especially when it's popular to be wearing black.

 I imagine she is thinking"Hey look now you look GREAT, i have added my special touch and everyone will know you have a dog at home. Now they will know that leftovers must be taken home to feed the starving animal". 

"Starving dog! Leftovers Please?"

When your mood really fucking sucks

What to do when your mood really fucking sucks:

1. Sleep 
   
2. Watch Tv for hours
   
3. Sleep
   
4. Skip work and lie about why you didnt go in
5. Sleep
6. Sit on the computer and look at the screen
7. Not eat
8. Read
9. Sit some more
10. Refuse to think because that wont help at all 
11. Be AntiSocial

And when thats not enough - sleep some more. 

I want to sleep forever

Oh December...

Don't get me wrong I love the holidays but sometimes ... Xmas can be a huge pain in the ass. 

Some top christmas peeves:

1. Fruit Cake - The fucking gift that never stops giving. It never rots and its a disgusting brick of the worlds most unappetizing cake with little jelly things that usually look like an elf that ate too much christmas spirit upchucked on it

2. Inflatable Snowmen - Those creepy things... Not only do they scare my dog at night they are ugly and tacky... MAKE A REAL SNOWMAN. No one wants to walk by your house and see a huge creepy thing larger then your house on your front lawn.

3. Overdecorated Houses - Guess what-  You can over decorate your house people! 1 billion christmas lights is not beautiful, it's painful to look at. The worse is those freaks that think its cool to set their lights up to music and then people drive by, tune into a special radio station and watch and listen to the show. Take your gingerbread houses somewhere else where I don't have to see them. 

Theres a whole site devoted to people with their terrible light hanging taste: 

http://www.uglychristmaslights.com/

4. Christmas Music - It's great if it was to start a week before or heck even two but it seems like its a year long phenomenon now. Once Halloween is done its time to bust out the music. This includes of course the terrible pop artist remakes of classics, techno christmas music and a whole spectrum of music that is enough to make your ears bleed. 

5. Ugly Christmas Trees - They are everywhere! I don't want to see a cheep fake tree thats taped together, the branches are all bald and there are like 3 or 4 little decorations on the tree and like red bows. It's not that hard to come up with a creative pretty tree on a low budget even. 

More to come...

Up Down All Around

Sometimes things are perfect, but - unfortunately you're mood does not follow what is going on in your life. 

Good things: 

- Opened a fantastic show with a group of visually impaired actors and it was amazing

- I have lots of energy to work

- I can sleep long because I start actually working late 

- working a lot = money to spend 

- lots of time to laze about or be social

Yet... I feel like crap... 

List of Good cartoons worth watching once in a while: 

- Simpsons 

- Futurama

- South Park

- Bugs Bunny and Tweety Show

- Family guy

Best to watch when your tired and you are multitasking.

Thought of the Day

If cat's sleep for 20 hours a day - are up for only 4 hours. Do they differentiate being awake or asleep? Do their dreams seem like their actual lives? 

I found an article as a follow up to see if cats actually do dream and - of course they do. 

"During sleep, our brain releases inhibiting substances to prevent us from acting out our dreams fully, although we may toss, turn and even talk in our sleep. The feline brain works similarly. In laboratory experiments where unfortunate feline subjects have had their brains tampered with so that those substances aren't released, the cats act out their dreams in full. Even laboratory-bred cats which have never hunted, or even seen prey, have been observed to 'catch birds', 'chase mice' and 'bat prey' in the course of their dreams."

Music and Sights

There was a beautiful sunset today - my camera of course can't do it justice but it was quite a sight

For todays post I'm going to try to compile some of my favorite songs and the beautiful inspiring lyrics in them. Though the songs are usually a bit sad they talk about hope and the beauty of life.

 "I'm never going to know you now, but I'm going to love you anyhow"

Waltz #2 - Elliot Smith

"Reaching out for a hand that we can't see 

Everybody's got a hold on hope 

It's the last thing that's holding me"

Hold on Hope - Guided by Voices

"Lets just sing and we'll fill the air with melodies that blend together 

You speak so sweet with words so delicate 

A glass i hope will never shatter"

If you Fall - Azure Ray

"Now I don’t know where I am I don’t know where I’ve been But I know where I want to go"

First Day Of My Life - Bright Eyes

"If there's no one beside you 

When your soul embarks 

Then I'll follow you into the dark" 

I Will Follow You Into the Dark - Death Cab For Cutie

"Lady lights a cigarette, puffs away, no regret
Takes a look around, no regrets, no regrets
Stretches out like branches of a poplar tree

She says, i'm free"

Lady - Regina Spektor

 

"Cause life has been insane but Today has been ok"

Today Has Been Ok - Emiliana Torrini

"And I've become just like a chemical stress 
Tracing the lines of my face for 
Something more beautiful than is there 
I've barely been gone 
and I'm not a failure 
I swear 
I wish you could see it from over there"

My Slumbering Heart - Rilo Kiley

And my favorite

"This is how it works 
You're young until you're not 
You love until you don't 
You try until you can't 
You laugh until you cry 
You cry until you laugh 
And everyone must breathe 
Until their dying breath"

On the Radio - Regina Spektor 

Let it Snow Let it Snow Let it Snow!

It was snowing gently when I was on my way to rehearsal tonight. When I left the rehearsal I was pleasantly surprised by the winters first snow that crunched pleasantly under my feet when I walked! 

I rushed home to take my dog out and let her enjoy the fresh snow. 

It looked like this:

The on leash experience and investigation of the white fluffy substance

Followed by some attempting to lick up some snowflakes 

Which was followed by 15 minutes of the wild piggy gallop

All in all it was a great outing

It has Toffees approval  

"Life is Perfect"

Let the good times roll. My last few weeks have been spent looking at beautiful art, reading, visiting galleries and occasionally working - in short "Life is Perfect!"

The recently cooling temperatures and frequent cold rain can't even dampen my mood to explore and enjoy the world. 

A typical day:

1. Wake up (usually no earlier then 11am)

2. Depending on the day stay in bed and look out my window to enjoy the world outside or read a little bit

3. Hop out of bed, shower, get ready, eat

4. Watch the news while checking world news online and checking emails

5. Catch up on work

6. Go on an adventure (sometimes just to the park with the dog)

7. Buy a new book

8. Either work or socialize

9. Curl up with book

10. Have a late night 4am smoke and enjoy the city being as silent as it gets in a day and then finally sleep

How much better can it get? Days are long and dragged out, theres always something to see and enjoy even in my own city which more and more I'm feeling like a tourist in because there is so much to visit. I find myself frequently saying or thinking "If I was told I would die tomorrow I would continue on with today exactly the same way." Guess living every day like it was my last really suits me.

With all the reading I have done I guess I will make a short graphic novel list which has been my favorite thing to read recently:

1. Blankets - Craig Thompson

2. Sandman Endless Nights - Neil Gaiman

3. Epileptic - David B.

4. Watchmen - Alan Moore 

5. Persepolis - Marjane Satrapi 

These are all amazing works and I recommend you wiki or google a few of them for the heck of it. Don't be mistaken - they are not just pretty little comic books. They are serious books for adults with heavy themes, intricate stories and beautiful art. 

_ _ _ _

Sometimes... I find myself really angry at the world. Really really angry. I want to be alone and away from everyone and everything.  I destroy stuff, clear out my computer instead of taking it out on others. The final step is clearing out my room (which I did today). After 6 hrs of cleaning and filling 2 garbage bags of junk plus another huge pile of stuff to recycle... I cooled down and returned to my normal rhythm and state of lowness.

  

I thought I would post a list someone else made for me. 

Things I should remember when I am down:

• Friends
  
• Job
  
• Family
  
• Being back in school
  
• Love of others
  
• Being grounded and living in the present
  
• Positive choices
  
• Achievements
  

It's sitting on my iPod so I can look back at it at times like these. Everyone should carry around a list like this. On a little card or something to remind us why the hell we are here and something to remind us where we are going. 

On a side note - I found another note that made me laugh

"Do not feed the rubber ducks"

I can't remember when I wrote it down but I have the perfect image to go with it.

Why? Because they will grow super huge!

And some dark ducky humor:

Your last bath -

Some laughter

Sometimes laughter is the cure for all things bad... I seem to be getting this gift of laughter from many people recently in odd forms. This one is courtesy of Gavin. 

 

The following story and image go together:

The Neon-Tufted Green-Winged Blackbird (greenish-glowius phoeniceus) is a rare species of blackbird believed to nest primarily in Chernobyl, Ukraine region. It is believed that this species evolved from the common housefly due to elevated radiation levels and an abundance of greenish glowing crap in the environment. Sightings these days are extremely rare. In this undated photo, you will notice the tell-tale tuft accented by tiny green dreadlock-like feathers. The freakishly long tail feathers and brightly glowing wings give this quirky bird an erractic flight pattern which prohibits them from landing gracefully. This becomes painfully evident as demonstrated by the badly disfigured leg on this klutzy bird. 

It is also believed that this species is the first member of the avian family to actually perch with crossed-legs. If you examine the photo closely, you'll notice this odd behavior with its left leg perched to the right, and the right, crooked leg perched to the left. It is not clear why the bird chooses to do this, but theory is that since it is not the most graceful in flight, it often crosses it's legs to avoid a smack in the... you know...tweet tweets. 

The NTGWB enjoys perching on limbs of old trees... (which are covered in mildew, apparently). It will often sun itself in the rays of really cool, happy sunshine po days with the occasional Mickey Mouse or styrofoam peanut cloud. Oddly enough, the NTGWB's primary food source is peanuts dropped from peanut cargo planes with rusty cargo holds. It's large malformed beak, which would be the envy of any ornith-dontist, is perfectly suited for snatching, de-shelling, and devouring earth bound peanuts. The rarity of this bird is largely due to lack of any consistent food supply. 

Few photos exist of this bird in it's natural habitat. Bird geeks(aka enthusiasts) will often resort to extreme measures to capture this creature on film. In the background, you will notice a very thin man with a propeller implanted in his head -- heading skwyard to snap a photo with his black rectangle camera with offset lens. Because the technology is new, more work is needed to improve the power output of these heli-people devices to avoid the extreme dieting necessary to experience weightlessness. 

The Neon-Tufted Green-Winged Blackbird is truly a sight to behold. If you are fortunate enough to get close, do not look this bird straight in the eye. It is rumored that its freaky-ass eyes have a hypnotic effect and can actually cause you to draw very strange pictures in Microsoft Paint and write stories about them.

 This bird is protected by the National Wildlife Foundation and the Nuclear Energy Commission. 

It is illegal and downright dangerous to keep any animal that cause you to become sterile 

and grow extra appendages. 

Sometimes some creativity and a sense of humor is all you need in life... 

Break.

Due to lack of things to say and lack of clarity of thought. 

Sometimes you just have to laugh it off

Talking to a friend: 

Feels like a similar thing happened... Just a little compassion please. 

Since I'm on the subject of tasteless comics heres a few more in no particular order: 

                                           1.

                                           2.

                                           3.

4.                                                                                  

                                         5.

                                       6.

When nothing comes to mind

Somedays a list is actually not so easy to put together. We all have our off days right (or weeks in my case).  So this time I will just post a blog of random things - a vent.

1. I'm so tired it feel like I'm looking at everything through a piece of fabric (everything is fuzzy)

2. I saw my ex boyfriend on my way home

 - brought back old memories and feelings 

3. I may be really depressed but what's even more depressing, so are the people around me that I care about

4. The only hope I can find right now is the word thats tattooed on me

5. I can't communicate how I feel or what's going on in a way that helps

6. Fighting accomplishes nothing, it's never a solution. (cheesy)

7. Cheesy makes me think of food and I have not felt the need to eat in days 

8. I hate me. 

And I promised myself I would post up 3 positives so here they are:

1. I love my supportive friends (I can't thank them enough for putting up with me no matter how ungrateful I seem).

2. The show opens Thursday and I will finally be able to breathe 

3. I came up with 2 other positive things

My tattoo the first day I got it: 

Image "List"

Todays Feelings:

A hug would be nice

It's looking rainy outside

Cancer Hamster is going to need a hamster sized coffin soon

I'm unraveling inside

I really can't...

I wish I was this bunny.