Sometimes laughter is the cure for all things bad... I seem to be getting this gift of laughter from many people recently in odd forms. This one is courtesy of Gavin.
The following story and image go together:
The Neon-Tufted Green-Winged Blackbird (greenish-glowius phoeniceus) is a rare species of blackbird believed to nest primarily in Chernobyl, Ukraine region. It is believed that this species evolved from the common housefly due to elevated radiation levels and an abundance of greenish glowing crap in the environment. Sightings these days are extremely rare. In this undated photo, you will notice the tell-tale tuft accented by tiny green dreadlock-like feathers. The freakishly long tail feathers and brightly glowing wings give this quirky bird an erractic flight pattern which prohibits them from landing gracefully. This becomes painfully evident as demonstrated by the badly disfigured leg on this klutzy bird.
It is also believed that this species is the first member of the avian family to actually perch with crossed-legs. If you examine the photo closely, you'll notice this odd behavior with its left leg perched to the right, and the right, crooked leg perched to the left. It is not clear why the bird chooses to do this, but theory is that since it is not the most graceful in flight, it often crosses it's legs to avoid a smack in the... you know...tweet tweets.
The NTGWB enjoys perching on limbs of old trees... (which are covered in mildew, apparently). It will often sun itself in the rays of really cool, happy sunshine po days with the occasional Mickey Mouse or styrofoam peanut cloud. Oddly enough, the NTGWB's primary food source is peanuts dropped from peanut cargo planes with rusty cargo holds. It's large malformed beak, which would be the envy of any ornith-dontist, is perfectly suited for snatching, de-shelling, and devouring earth bound peanuts. The rarity of this bird is largely due to lack of any consistent food supply.
Few photos exist of this bird in it's natural habitat. Bird geeks(aka enthusiasts) will often resort to extreme measures to capture this creature on film. In the background, you will notice a very thin man with a propeller implanted in his head -- heading skwyard to snap a photo with his black rectangle camera with offset lens. Because the technology is new, more work is needed to improve the power output of these heli-people devices to avoid the extreme dieting necessary to experience weightlessness.
The Neon-Tufted Green-Winged Blackbird is truly a sight to behold. If you are fortunate enough to get close, do not look this bird straight in the eye. It is rumored that its freaky-ass eyes have a hypnotic effect and can actually cause you to draw very strange pictures in Microsoft Paint and write stories about them.
This bird is protected by the National Wildlife Foundation and the Nuclear Energy Commission.
It is illegal and downright dangerous to keep any animal that cause you to become sterile
and grow extra appendages.
Sometimes some creativity and a sense of humor is all you need in life...
